Expert advice for women to minimize the risk of male infidelity

As much as women hate to hear this, it’s true – men are hardwired to cheat on women sexually. This is due to the evolved sexual strategies of men that have been shaped over thousands of years of human development. From a Darwinian standpoint, men “win” in the evolutionary race when they have sex with and impregnate as many women as possible. This is the case because a man’s true cost of sex is very low, since men don’t have the risk of pregnancy and subsequent child rearing. Therefore, the more women a man has sex with, the higher the likelihood of getting his genes into the next generation. Conversely, women have to be much choosier about the men with whom they have sex, since a sub-optimal mate choice would be very costly in the long run, particularly if a woman were impregnated by a man with bad genes, or worse yet, by a man who abandoned her and left her to raise the child on her own, reducing the likelihood of the baby’s survival and ultimately reducing the chances of her genes passing into the next generation.

Consequently, men have evolved a sexual strategy of low-investment sex with a variety of different partners, while women have evolved an investment-seeking sexual strategy in the hopes of securing one great man with both excellent genetics and the ability to provide for her and her offspring. Nonetheless, there are some things women can do to reduce the risk of male infidelity, although most women aren’t willing to pay the price.


Do

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  • date men of low social status
  • choose a man who works primarily around other men
  • date an introvert
  • date boring men
  • date highly religious men
Don't

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  • date professional athletes, rockstars, or other celebrities
  • date wealthy men
  • date men who travel
  • date men who interact with many different people as part of their job
  • date unkind, unconscientious men

Dave Pounder‘s recommendation to ExpertBeacon readers: Do

Do date men of low social status

As Chris rock says, “Men are as faithful as their options.” If a woman wants to reduce the risk of male infidelity, her best option is to date men who don’t have many options sexually. Since most women are attracted to men of high social status, a woman can reduce the risk of her partner cheating by simply dating a man of low social status, such as a food service worker, postal worker, or auto mechanic. He isn’t necessarily being faithful by choice, but his lack of sexual options will keep him faithful by default.

Do choose a man who works primarily around other men

Again, when it comes to reducing male infidelity, the idea is to reduce his available sexual options. Choosing a man who works in sales or another profession that generally selects for attractive, personable, and confident people, often times traveling extensively, is not the best idea for reducing your partner’s sexual options. Rather, dating a guy who works primarily around other men, or in isolation, is a much safer bet. Consider dating computer programmers, mathematicians, statisticians, data analysts, and other engineering types, since their co-workers are typically also men, the travel requirements are light (if at all), and the women typically working in these fields are generally less attractive.

Do date an introvert

Introverts are much less likely to cheat because they are less social and don’t put themselves out there. Women are mostly attracted to outgoing, personable men. Introverts are generally the opposite. By dating an introvert, the pool of available women willing to sleep with your man is much smaller.

Do date boring men

Women aren’t attracted to boring men, so if you too are boring, then it may be a great fit. Most sexually willing women aren’t waiting to jump into bed with a boring corporate accountant; rather, it’s much more likely that she will instead sleep with the fun, outgoing pharmaceutical sales rep who happens to be in town for the annual sales meeting. By dating a boring, uneventful man, a woman’s relationship may not be the most exciting, but at least she will have likely secured a more faithful one.

Do date highly religious men

Men who are very religious are less likely to cheat because they believe that God is omnipresent. Most non-religious men won’t risk cheating and potentially ruining their relationship if their girlfriend or one of her family members or close friends is in close proximity, resulting in an increased risk of discovery and the higher likelihood of the information getting back to her. However, overly religious people believe that God is everywhere and sees everything. As such, many of these men feel that if they cheat, God will witness it and discipline them by denying them opportunities in the present life, or worse, an eternity in hell.


Dave Pounder‘s professional advice to ExpertBeacon readers: Don't

Do not date professional athletes, rockstars, or other celebrities

Dating a professional athlete, rockstar, or other celebrity is a huge mistake if a woman is looking to date a faithful man. Not only are these men typically very wealthy, but they also tend to have a large following of groupies who would love nothing more than a single night with your man. As one woman put it, “having sex with a celebrity is like an autograph, only a little more personal.” Many men pursue careers as athletes or rockstars merely because of the sexual gains that are had from attaining these positions.

Do not date wealthy men

Many men who don’t possess the traits that attract women (i.e., height, personality, confidence, success, social status) will instead use their resources to “purchase” a woman from time to time. This is similar to food in the modern day era. People who aren’t naturally good hunters will not simply starve. Rather, if they have the resources, they will go to the restaurant or grocery store and simply purchase food. Only those without hunting skills or resources to purchase food will perish, or perhaps find some scraps at the soup kitchen. This is true of men too. Even if a woman happens to date a boring, meek, introverted man, he too is likely to cheat if he has the available resources which will allow him to hire a girl from time to time. It happens all the time in the business world, especially when men travel.

Do not date men who travel

Most men cheat while traveling. After all, they are in a new town and the risk of discovery is very low since nobody his girlfriend (or her friends) knows is likely to be in the area. By dating a man who travels infrequently (if at all), a woman greatly reduce his options to stray.

Do not date men who interact with many different people as part of their job

Why do police officers, firefighters, sales reps, attorneys, college professors, and physicians have such a bad rap when it comes to infidelity? Because each of these professions causes the man to meet and interact with a variety of new people each day, which maximizes the potential sexual options for him. Since many women are attracted to authority (e.g., cops, firefighters) and intelligence/wealth (e.g., doctors, attorneys, professors), a woman can further reduce the risk of partner infidelity by dating men who interact with the same group of people every day, such as corporate accountants, financial analysts, or actuaries.

Do not date unkind, unconscientious men

The clear majority of men cheat, and those who don’t aren’t usually doing so by choice (it’s typically a lack of options due to low social status, low confidence, etc.). However, men are excellent at telling women what they want to hear and giving their partners the illusion of monogamy to keep their loving relationships going. After all, men are emotionally monogamous and do enjoy being in relationships with the women they love. A kind, conscientious man is much more likely to be discreet about his indiscretions and more diligent about covering his tracks, ultimately preventing his partner from ever finding out. As Chris Rock says, “Women are like the police. They can have all the evidence in the world, but what they really want is the confession.” A kind, conscientious man will never be callous enough to admit the infidelity, and his wife will always give him the benefit of the doubt. The result: two people living happily ever after. As such, it’s important to avoid dating men who are unkind or unconscientious, and therefore more likely to disregard a woman’s feelings by simply admitting that he cheated or had an affair.


Summary

Men are as faithful as their options, so the best way to keep a guy faithful is to date one with few sexual options. The problem is that most women don’t want to date that type of guy. Most women would rather date a tall, personable, successful, confident man of high-social status who cheats on them from time to time, as opposed to a faithful but short, meek, low-social status man of few resources who lives with his mother. Women would, ideally, like the best of both worlds – the confident, high social status man who is sexually committed to her, but unfortunately that man does not exist (although plenty of men will give their partner the illusion of monogamy to keep the relationship alive). The fictional man whom most women desire is just as elusive as the very pretty, nice, sweet woman with a perfect body who has no desire for fine dining, traveling the world, children, marriage, gifts, or any of the other things in life that consume a large amount of a man’s resources.

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