Is knight armor hot?

For us modern gamers, slipping on a VR headset and grabbing some controllers is no big deal. But for medieval knights, suiting up in their badass armor was like entering an Iron Man exoskeleton combined with a mobile sauna.

Let‘s get into the science of why knight armor got so freaking hot…

Metal Boils Blood Better Than Water

The steel used in knight armor can reach scorching temps. We‘re talking surface temperatures over 140°F on a sunny day. Yikes!

See, metals like steel have high thermal conductivity, so they absorb environmental heat easily. A fancy way of saying they get hot fast.

But wait, it gets worse…

Metals also have high emissivity. That means they radiate absorbed heat outward very efficiently.

So steel armor soaks up heat from the sun and battlefield fires, then beams that warmth right into the knight‘s body. It‘s like getting microwaved from the inside!

With all that conducted AND radiated heat, it‘s no wonder knights boiled like lobsters in their suits. Some lost multiple liters of fluid from extreme sweating. Hydration Check!

Armor ACs – Not the Comfy Kind!

Medieval armor came in all flavors – leather, chainmail, and solid plate. But which was the hottest?

Plate armor takes the heat cake 🍰. Those solid steel plates trapped air and body heat like a bike helmet wrapped around your entire body.

Chainmail gave a bit more airflow than plates, so was slightly cooler. But the rings still soaked up the sun and didn‘t breathe well. No AC there!

Leather armor was cooler than metal…but still crazy hot. Like wearing football pads everywhere. At least you won‘t roast?

Pro Gamer Knight Tips for Cooling Down

How did our metal-clad ancestors prevent baking like cookies in their own armor? Check out these pro cooling tips:

• Soak gambesons (armor undershirts) in water to vaporize sweat.

• Loosen up that chainmail to maximize air circulation. Freedom!

• Take breaks in shade to strip armor and cool off.

• Helmet vents provided sweet, sweet airflow to the face.

• Light linen clothing wicked away sweat like a champ.

With tricks like these, knights could last a bit longer before melting into a metal puddle. But it was still hot as Hades in that gear.

Epic Fails: Rookie Knights Dropping Like Flies

Don‘t even get me started on the noobs who passed out from heat exhaustion.

Newbie knights would lock up their armor way too tight, failing to vent heat or allow sweat evaporation. Some even forgot to drink water!

Needless to say, these fresh meat knights ended up fainting after only a few hours roasting in their cans. They make for funny stories, but extra armor prep could‘ve prevented those epic fails.

The Cold Side: Freezing Your Tail Off

Of course too much heat wasn‘t the only climate peril. Knights also faced off in brutal winter battles.

The freezing cold steel of armor sapped away body warmth. Gauntlets risked frostbite. Simply walking or riding in the icy muck was a chore.

To avoid becoming knight-cicles, layers of fur, leather, and wool went under the armor. Feet were stuffed into woolen bags. Fires took the chill off armor before dressing.

But those winter knight battles were still misery. Not even a Hot Pocket could save you.

The Legacy of Boiled, Frozen Knights

So after learning all this, you gotta respect just how tough our armored ancestors were. They pressed on through scorching heat and frigid cold while sealed in those medieval iron torture devices.

Next time your game lags and you sigh about the unbearable wait, remember the knight who cooked inside his armor waiting for battle. Makes a minute of latency seem pretty tolerable, eh?

Game on, brave knights! But please, mind the temperature.